In my life, I have been burned several times, mainly by repeating the same mistakes, making excuses for and blaming others for my problems. I used to think that running away from my problems was the best way to deal with them; I thought out of sight, out of mind. I began to accept my life and became comfortable with the circumstances and quality of my life. When people close to me told me that I could be doing something better with my life and that I should stop being such a failure, I said that I would make it in life and I would (insert list of lies here).
There were too many times that I said I would do something and failed to follow through and complete what I said I was going to do. Pretty soon people near and dear began to lose faith in me. They treated me like I could not be trusted with even the simplest things, I felt horrible and useless. I was being babysat about everything I did and was asked too many questions; I was pretty much being monitored by my own family and friends.
The fact of the matter is no one wants to hear that they can’t do something, nor does anyone want to be lectured about how they are lazy and how they are not going to go anywhere in life. It was hard to hear and I got all defensive, because it was the truth. I had just been avoiding my problems and just going through life without actually living. Needless to say I didn’t get very far in life.
After I graduated with my undergrad I moved to a new city. Shortly after, I broke down and started crying hysterically filled with anger, sadness and regret. That day I truly felt the deep impact that my failure to act on what I said had. I reached a point where I was so fed up with my life and my circumstances and sick of feeling sad and throwing pity parties about where I was in my life, I decided to make a change and my attitude. More importantly I apologized to all those that I had let down and took personal responsibility for all my mistakes and all the times I didn’t follow through.
After facing the obstacles that resulted from my poor choices and repeated mistakes, I have begun to set goals and construct a plan of action to achieve those goals. I have made the decision to work hard everyday so that I can get one step closer to achieving my goals. It took me quite awhile, but I now know more than ever that it is important to do what you are going to say. Speaking from experience, if you don’t, you start to lose credibility, and get associated to words such as being a liar, unreliable, a failure and that you’re all talk and no action. I can also tell you that complaining doesn’t help, it just wastes precious time.
A few months after moving I had a lot of time to think about my thoughts and I noticed that most of them were negative and self-sabotaging. Since then I have taken a new perspective on life. I vow to work towards repairing and rebuilding the relationships that I have ruined by giving my all whenever performing any task as big or small as it may be.
My new found motto is “don’t say it, just do it“, and let everyone see the results for themselves. This is based on a results oriented thinking that stems from knowing what I need to do in my own mind without involving others in the process. Simply put, my only enemy, is me.
I have made so many mistakes and have regrets about decisions that I have made in the past. I feel like I am paying for them now but I am not going to sit here and complain about it. I have realized that the only thing I can do moving forward is to learn from my mistakes to ensure that I don’t repeat the same ever again. I used to view being a failure and constantly failing as one of the worst and scariest things ever. Now, I have changed the way I think about failing and view it in a more positive light; I have discovered a way but there is a better way, so I must try again.
What added to my positive, new outlook on life is Tony Robbins. I have started listening to Anthony Robbins Personal Power II series and can say that this has been really helpful. I recommend it to everyone and anyone who is looking for the fundamentals to becoming successful. Tony keeps you accountable and motivated, he gets down to the roots of success and how you can reprogram your thoughts and mind to live your dreams.
Remember: Don’t be afraid to admit your wrongs, failures or mistakes, after all acknowledgement is part of the learning and improvement process!
Have you ever felt this way? Please comment and share your story.
Stay strong and beautiful!